I remember saying that I won't migrate overseas just for a better job and more secure finance. I love the Philippines. Although my citizenship says otherwise, my allegiance is with this country and so is my heart. But come to think of it and seeing everything that is happening here, like the church continuously pushing their say in something where the government has greater rights in and even threatening people just to send their message across, it is slowly becoming harder each day to bear with this..this.. close-mindedness. I want a place where people are free to think without being judged. I want somewhere I can talk to random people about what they think about life, strike an intelligent conversation. I want a place that's more accepting, more logical but equally respectful of everyone's beliefs.

Dear random stranger,

     I do not know you, thus the name 'random stranger,' but I have recently been fantasizing about you. When will you show yourself and where? I have been hanging out at coffee shops alone long enough. I have been walking through random streets in hope that you will someday see and talk to me despite the air of awkwardness I usually possess. I wish you would see through my introversion. I promise you, once you break the ice, you wouldn't even notice that I have this tendency to be soft-spoken in public.
     Although you are a random stranger, I hope we would find a connection, even in the silliest aspects of our interests. Or if not, maybe we can agree to disagree about something after bickering for five minutes and then laughing at ourselves for the sheer absurdity of it all. And afterwards, we shall see the beauty of our conversations, of how fluid and flexible they are, moving from one topic of relevance to a light one with no profound impact to anyone at all.
     Anyway, it's getting late and I still have to wake up early tomorrow. Please random stranger, show yourself and talk to me. Initiate it because I wouldn't have the courage to.

Respectfully yours,
Aldrin.

Conclusions

Yes, I have been making too much conclusions, too soon. It's not over since I still have this phenomenon called life in this hardly-functioning body that's slowly becoming dependent on nicotine and caffeine. Nevertheless, everything shall be in continuity; even forgotten circumstances, although I know they're somewhere at the back of my head waiting to surface anytime.
I'm feeling extremely stupid nowadays. My thoughts are the epitome of incoherence, I have trouble comprehending what people tell me and still, the ever-so-loyal commitment issues. Oh well.

I'm tired but my conscience would not stop bugging me if I deliberately fail my subjects. I have that internal drive that forces me to study and do my tasks well. I mean, what am I here for if not to study and try to exert my best efforts, right? It's just tiring sometimes, although there is no stopping to this sick obsession.

Looking back, I can just laugh at the absurdity of my actions before. I didn't believe in hokum like wishing at 11:11 but because I was so desperate and I had nothing to cling unto, I wished. I wished you would come back. You did but not in the way that I wanted you to, which is good because it got me thinking about what we have and why it cannot work. It's fun to laugh at the stupid things we did in the past.